


Repeat the Discovery

by Depressed_Lemon_Bite



Category: Bleach
Genre: Enterprise Captain!Ichigo, Fluff, M/M, Romance, Smut, Star Trek AU, Tooth-Rotting Fluff, Vulcan Culture, Vulcan!Grimmjow
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-11
Updated: 2018-11-11
Packaged: 2019-08-22 05:42:02
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 12,904
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16591904
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Depressed_Lemon_Bite/pseuds/Depressed_Lemon_Bite
Summary: “You are my t’hy’la, Captain. You always have been. From the moment you entered my life to the moment I take my last breath, that feeling will follow me even beyond the grave.”“I’m...I’m your what?” Ichigo began, frowning softly and licking his lips, “Thigh-what?”“T’hy’la,” Grimmjow corrected, the arms folded behind his back being clawed by his antsy hands, “T’hy’la is...the only thing in my culture that I take seriously. It’s a word used to describe...a very important person. It has three meanings: friend, brother...and lover.”





	Repeat the Discovery

**Author's Note:**

> Ichigo is a human man, captain of the USS Enterprise and Grimmjow is a Vulcan-human mix and the Science Officer and First Officer to Ichigo.
> 
> Vulcan Language:  
> \- T'hy'la: Vulcan term for friend, lover, and brother. Term can be used to mean just one or two of the words, but is usually used for all three.  
> \- Ashayam: beloved  
> \- Ashau nash-veh tu: I love you
> 
> Vulcan Culture:  
> \- Vulcan's are touch telepaths and take their hands very seriously. They also kiss by using their hands. Because of this they do not typically touch other's hands or perform handshakes.  
> \- Driven to be logical, Vulcan's have cut off all ties to emotion. They still feel them but they try to hide it. Grimmjow is half human so that makes his relationships harder to control.  
> \- Pon Farr: every seven years from when they reach maturity, male Vulcans go into a state where they are easily irritated, violent, and horny on main. They legit have to fuck or die.  
> \- Shariel is one of many Vulcan pagan gods, this one is the god of death.

“You are my t’hy’la, Captain. You always have been. From the moment you entered my life to the moment I take my last breath, that feeling will follow me even beyond the grave.”

Grimmjow never expected to hate silence. With a ship as large as theirs, stuffed from one end to the other with over four hundred crewmen, a moment of peace was treasured. A sacred rarity. Even long after he retired to his room his sharp ears caught faint whispers of the restless crew roaming the halls and the telltale giggles of neighboring late night visits. This was the first time in years—since he left home, actually—that his ears rang from deafening silence. He wished his beloved captain would say something. Anything. Preferably something kind that would sooth the racing heart beating against his ribcage. His captain seemed so dazed. Pink lips parted and quivered as if to speak but were never forthcoming with words. His eyes unblinking and locked tightly with the Vulcan. Many— _so many_ —emotions cycled across Captain Kurosaki’s face that Grimmjow was left wondering if such a rapid experience was painful, and if he had made the correct decision. His captain was highly intelligent and gentle beyond comparison which made him incredibly efficient at diffusing risky situations, but the ability to handle romance and attraction eluded him. Grimmjow had seen it many times before. As inappropriate as it was for crew members to confess their romantic feelings to their captain, it hadn’t stopped any of them from doing so. On countless occasions Grimmjow had watched Kurosaki squirm and sweat under the eager and hopeful gaze of his crew as he sputtered apologies and explanations for his rejection. Grimmjow hated watching the crew make a fool of themselves by professing their love, but now he had done the same. Except, unlike his subordinates, his feelings were true and they would never fade. Somehow that only made the truth harder for his captain to swallow.

“I’m...I’m your what?” Ichigo began, frowning softly and licking his lips, “Thigh-what?”

“T’hy’la,” Grimmjow corrected, the arms folded behind his back being clawed by his antsy hands, “T’hy’la is...the only thing in my culture that I take seriously. It’s a word used to describe...a very important person. It has three meanings: friend, brother...and lover.”

This was the face Grimmjow hated. The one where Ichigo’s lively expressions were muted to be as unreadable as his own. Emotions were confusing but at least he was able to judge a situation by the look in his captain’s eyes. Now he couldn’t. His captain was dangerous when unpredictable.

“Which meaning do you use?” Ichigo asked.

“You are my friend, Captain, and I do occasionally see us as brothers in arms, but I also view you as...a romantic possibility,” Grimmjow explained cautiously. He wanted to be truthful with his captain, but he didn’t want to scare him away either. Possibility wasn’t the word he wanted to use. _Destiny_ was more befitting. However, just because it was **his** destiny to bond with his captain that didn’t mean it was **Kurosaki’s** destiny to return such nonsense. They had only known each other for a year, after all. He was the one who allowed his heart to run rampant and unchecked.

Kurosaki blinked slowly, the brown irises sparkling in a strange form of stunned wonder. “Lover….”

“You do not have to say anything, Captain. I am not asking for an answer or mirrored feelings. I merely wanted to tell you because—,” Grimmjow paused. Why _did_ he want to tell him? Expressing such a massive emotional need like this was indecent in not only his culture but in the eyes of Star Base. His captain was supposed to be untouchable and therefore never touched. Grimmjow, however, wanted to get his hands _all over_ the man’s beautiful body. The Vulcan cringed at his lewd thoughts and lowered his arms to his sides. That was even worse. There were more regulations against _that_ than relationships. He shouldn’t have brought this up. It was a stupid, compulsive decision to bring his captain here and say such idiotic things. He had put his captain on the spot. This was reckless and cruel against himself and Kurosaki. His captain was so conscious and sensitive about the feelings of others. To suddenly blurt such nonsense—for the captain’s _first officer_ and recently claimed _close friend_ to blurt such nonsense, and in Grimmjow’s very own private quarters, no less—was beyond selfish, it was mean spirited.

“Grimmjow?”

The Vulcan’s body jolted at the sound of his name. Goosebumps devoured his flesh and his spine tingled as he met the captain’s eyes once more and chewed the inside of his cheek. Damn their ridiculous height difference. If he had been pure human he doubted there would have been a major difference between them, but because of his green blood he towered six inches over Kurosaki’s five-foot-eleven fit form. He hated it. It made Kurosaki look cuter than he really was. And he was cute enough to begin with.

“Grimmjow.”

A hand stretched out toward Grimmjow and his heart lurched. Ichigo’s rough fingers came dangerously close to touching the flesh on the back of his hand when he paused, remembering who and _what_ Grimmjow was, and dropped his hand back to his side while worrying his bottom lip.

“Um, why...why did you tell me?” Ichigo asked.

Grimmjow straightened his spine, struggling to look like a man who _should_ be wearing such a high ranking uniform. “I suppose I did it because it was too much to hold inside. I can only take so much when it comes to emotions, Captain.”

“Then why didn’t you tell me sooner?”

Stunned was such a dramatic word but it was the only label that currently fit his state of being. He hadn’t expected anger from his captain nor had he expected a bubbling display of returned affection. Instead his captain stood before him with a vibrant blush staining his freckled cheeks and the tips of his rounded ears, with a nervous look of excitement and disbelief twisting the usual scowl from the blonde’s face and making him appear younger. How could he be so open with those emotions? Anger, hatred, and bloodlust Grimmjow understood, everything else seemed so... _vulnerable_.

“Excuse me, Captain?” Grimmjow said.

That smile was deadly. A wide curl of plump pink lips urged his heart to tear through his body and drop at the captain’s feet. It pushed so many feelings through his veins that Grimmjow was easily overwhelmed, swimming in emotions he hadn’t felt in years or had never felt before.

“You should’ve said something sooner, idiot. Who knows how long you’ve been needing to say that. Possibly as long as I’ve been wanting to confess to you,” Ichigo admitted with a chuckle.

Grimmjow swayed where he stood, dizzy as he digested the words of his commanding officer. “Confess, Captain?”

Oh powerful Shariel, take him now, for being slayed by the god of death would be less torturous than the arousal he felt at the sight of his captain’s smirk. That look was just as deadly as his smile, but it was a sweet, paralyzing poison he would eagerly drink no matter the risk. He truly was a careless beast.

“I’m shocked someone as intuitive as you didn’t notice. Everyone else on the ship did,” Kurosaki’s smirk soured into a frown of annoyance, “Rukia pretty much beat the truth out of me; then beat me _with_ the truth because there’s a lot of cruel mirth built up in that tiny gremlin body.”

“Truth, Captain?” He had to be hallucinating. There’s no way his captain, the youngest captain in history, a _**legend**_ , meant what Grimmjow thought he meant.

The blonde chuckled. Crossing his arms, Kurosaki leaned back against the door with his foot cocked back on the cold metal, smiling at his first officer with a devilish light in his eyes. “Geeze, Jaegerjaquez, what do you think we’ve been talking about for the past ten minutes? You’re a genius, aren’t you? You should know by now that I’ve had a thing for you since you came aboard my ship. I would’ve done something about it sooner if I weren’t the captain. I didn’t want to come off as some bastard that would take advantage of his crew; and the higher-ups would throw a fit if I were to get romantically involved with anyone below me,” Kurosaki paused and smirked again, “No pun intended.”

Yet again another feeling Grimmjow hadn’t felt since he was a child. A green blush claimed his cheeks as Kurosaki’s words repeated a blunt mantra inside his head: _The captain likes you. The captain feels the same way you feel for him. He likes you._ Damn his weak human half for being so pathetic. His heart felt as if it would burst, jumping within his ribcage like a bird wishing to be freed. So many emotions swirled within him. Joy. Relief. Fear. Desire. Insecurity. And the biggest one of all that he could hardly form within his thoughts, much less materialize on his tongue. _His_ t’hy’la _liked him back._ His t’hy’la liked him back! That ache he had felt for the past year returned at full force and he bit the inside of his cheek.

“Uh, Grimm? You doin’ okay, man? You look...overwhelmed,” Kurosaki said with a tilt of his head, releasing his arms to his sides.

“I am fine,” Grimmjow replied slowly, “Just...trying to process everything.”

“Uh, okay. Do you need to sit down?” Ichigo asked as his brow furrowed.

“No. I am finding it difficult on choosing...how to proceed,” he admitted, clenching his fists momentarily, “Unfortunately my body is telling me two different things from two very separate cultures and...I do not know which one to listen to.”

Vulcans desired space and simple, heated touches of hands, while humans craved a carnal closeness Grimmjow wasn’t sure he could survive; despite his vicious behavior in battle. Blue eyes flickered down to Ichigo’s hands and the Vulcan groaned inwardly. Those hands were very different from a Vulcan’s. His race regarded hands highly and as such they typically focused on caring for them, and due to their logical based society with a repulsion toward battle their hands were relatively soft. Delicate, in a sense. His captain...his captain was much different. Kurosaki’s hands were calloused and rough with scars and freckles mottling the flesh. They would undoubtedly scratch Grimmjow’s skin in a sinful nature that would mimic Kurosaki nibbling on various parts of his body, or nails clawing down his spine, and he shouldn’t want such a thing but he _did_. For so long Grimmjow had wanted to grab those gorgeous hands and damn the consequences. Then the other side of his DNA asked for something else entirely. He didn’t just want Kurosaki’s hands on his. He wanted the captain’s body pressed against him, fitted against his body like a missing piece to an unfinished puzzle. To feel the blonde moan into his mouth. For his captain to cast shivers throughout his sweat drenched body from a breathy sigh. For Kurosaki to pin him to his mattress and fuck him with every last inch of his life. It was embarrassing to think of things like this.

“Well...if you’re comfortable with it, I could take the lead.”

Pulled from his thoughts, Grimmjow watched his captain approach slowly, cautious as the gap between their bodies faded. He raised his hands carefully, holding one out as if inviting him to dance and the other performing a Vulcan salute. He came to a stop a few inches shy from Grimmjow’s prominent chest without a smile on his face, but he wasn’t scowling either. The captain was trying to remain neutral to allow Grimmjow to make his own decision.

“And you don’t have to decide between the two parts of you. I’d rather have all of you, if I could,” it was impossible for his captain to keep a smile from his lovely face, especially when his lush brown eyes sparkled with drops of gold, “I love my logical Vulcan first officer as much as I love my irrational human Grimmjow.”

Love. Grimmjow’s heart ached at the sound of that wonderful word rolling from the captain’s soft lips. Vulcan or human, it didn’t matter. His captain wanted _him_ , whatever he may be. Grimmjow’s features melted, the rough edges turning smooth as all of his walls crumbled one by one until nothing but Grimmjow in his rawest form was left behind. Pale hands lifted, his shadows darkening tanned skin as chilled palms cradled Ichigo’s face in his large hands.

“Captain, my t’hy’la….”

There weren’t enough words to describe this feeling so he didn’t bother trying to finish his sentence. He was never good with words anyway. He was much better at taking action. Pulling Ichigo to his body and crushing their lips in a desperate, sloppy kiss was more than enough of a statement. They moaned into each other’s mouths as their kiss deepened, savoring the taste of the other on their tongues—which was even better than they had imagined. Their bodies began to merge as they sank further into each other’s arms, pale hands cooling heated cheeks as calloused fingers combed through long blue hair. Grimmjow shivered as fingers ghosted over the smooth metal of a silver hair clip, fingertips tracing the detailed engraving of the Vulcan solar system. He knew that star map by heart. He knew which stars his captain touched, which moons and planets his nails grazed as he took hold of the clip’s end. Then, when Kurosaki released his hair by removing the clip, his mind blanked. Layers upon layers of thick, wavy blue hair spilled down his back and shoulders in a theatrical display, imitating a waterfall that stooped low and ended at mid-thigh. Those lovely hands were carding through his hair in seconds, ridding Grimmjow of pesky tangles and massaging his tender scalp—it all was too much.

“C-Captain—.”

His desperate plea was interpreted incorrectly by his t’hy’la. Instead of releasing him he was held tighter, every inch of his body pressed against his captain’s fit form and hands fisting in his hair, pulling on blue locks until Grimmjow moaned—and continued pulling still. Their teeth clacked together as they parted for breath, eyes clouded with need and desire.

“Captain...I—.”

 _Crap_. Ichigo kissed him again, relentlessly attacking his lips and tongue with his own. Grimmjow swayed, the motion unnoticed by his excited captain. He was light headed and dizzy, overwhelmed by things he wasn’t used to. As much as he tried to reject it, his Vulcan heritage and culture held greater meaning than he wanted it to. This closeness between him and another person, even his t’hy’la, overwhelmed him more than he originally thought. He’s had sex before, but it wasn’t passionate. It was hardly satisfying, too. This was almost too passionate, and was satisfying beyond his wildest dreams—made obvious by the massive erection trapped between his thigh and Kurosaki’s hip. He needed to end this. Just long enough to gather himself and breathe. Maybe take things slowly. It wasn’t usually his style since he was a fairly blunt person, but with this particular human—fingers passed over the pointed tips of his ears and Grimmjow stilled. That had to be a mistake, right? No human would willingly touch—the rough pads on Kurosaki’s fingers traced the shape of his ear, stroking the sensitive flesh and counting silver piercings silently as Ichigo nibbled on his lip. Holy _shit_. Grimmjow’s knees quaked. The drunken haze shrouding his mind overtook his body with a buzz and his stance crumbled. A deep green blush stained his skin and dyed his pale face the peculiar hue; his large hands took hold of his captain’s wrists and—using strength he vowed to never use against his captain—forcefully pushed him back, shattering their kiss as he continued to shake.

“Grimm? Are you okay? Did I do something wrong?” Ichigo asked.

His captain’s protective, mothering nature was ever present as always. “I-I’m fine, Captain. I just...I think I really need to sit down,” Grimmjow said.

“O-oh! O-of course! Here.”

Minding his hands, Ichigo took Grimmjow by his elbow and wrist and lead him to his bed; to which, Ichigo noticed, was suggestively large and dressed in red satin sheets. When Grimmjow sat down on familiar sheets the haze on his mind began to recede and allowed him to watch his captain sit beside him, his hands slowly retreating.

“Are you okay? I didn’t hurt you did I? Or cross a line?” Ichigo asked.

“You worry too much, Captain,” Grimmjow dismissed before growing quiet, “I’m not...used to people touching me like that. My previous partners weren’t as passionate or... _willing_ to explore. Particularly my ears.”

For the first time he found himself unable to meet his Captain’s brown eyes. This was embarrassing to talk about. He wasn’t very talkative in the first place and now he had to explain why he was blushing and falling apart emotionally like a human. His mother would be ashamed. Not that she wasn’t already.

“Your, uh, other partners...were any of them human?” Ichigo asked.

“No. My previous partners were more...professional and business-like during sex than your human style.”

“So I overwhelmed you.”

“Essentially yes. But don’t blame yourself for anything, Captain, you had no knowledge of this and the experience wasn’t displeasing by any means,” Grimmjow explained hastily, recognizing the guilt twinkling in the blonde’s eyes, “I’ve had experiences that weren’t bland but...they are not particularly memorable.”

His captain gave him a strange look—one of curiosity, he assumed—but he refused to say more. It wasn’t that they weren’t worth remembering, it’s that he couldn’t remember them. Not completely, that is. It was due to the blasted Vulcan seven year curse that he, unfortunately, had to bear. His senses were heightened along with his emotions, but his inhibitions and mental capability were severely lowered. But he didn’t dare explain any of this to his captain. The details of pon farr were strictly prohibited from outsiders of the Vulcan empire. That included his t’hy’la. Grimmjow chewed the inside of his cheek. Hiding something so important from his t’hy’la...it was more painful than he had expected.

“Then...why don’t we follow Vulcan procedures? It is how you were raised and it seems to be more...tame,” Ichigo offered with a crooked grin, “Although applying the word ‘tame’ to you is a strange thought.”

“It is not tame by Vulcan standards,” Grimmjow said, then frowned, “But Captain...will you get any enjoyment out of it?”

Ichigo smiled and eyes softened with a melting emotion that eased Grimmjow’s nerves and also caused his heart to race. “I get to learn more about Vulcan culture and I get to see you enjoying yourself with me. I don’t see how I _couldn’t_ enjoy it.”

Such an honest face. Such an honest _person_. Grimmjow still couldn’t believe such a human existed. He had seen all of humanity’s cruelty firsthand; to have a representation of all the good humanity can be wrapped into one person was surreal.

“If you are willing...then I can show you,” Grimmjow said. Damn that beautiful smile. It made it so hard to breathe.

Ichigo shifted on the bed, dropping a leg to the floor to support himself as he faced the Vulcan head on and spread his hand out before him. “Alright. I know that your kisses start out with the Vulcan salute—that’s right, right?”

The fading blush on Grimmjow’s cheeks burned vibrant once again. That was fairly...forward. At least, amongst his people it was. Hell, Ichigo probably only saw this as a handshake.

“W-well, actually Captain, Vulcan kisses are typically the index and middle finger side by side, pressing against someone else’s index and middle finger. What you are suggesting is more...intense,” he explained.

Ichigo’s eyes bounced to the door and back. “Isn’t that what we’re kind of going for? I mean, if I need to dial it back—.”

“No. It is fine. I am just—.”

“Scared?”

Grimmjow scowled and bristled. “Vulcans do not feel fear, Captain.”

“But humans do,” Ichigo replied, his smile small and gentle, “I am right now.”

His captain knew him too well. Grimmjow wrung his hands and avoided Ichigo’s eyes. Whether Ichigo was actually scared or not didn’t matter. He was trying to keep Grimmjow from feeling lonely and alienated, and he was successful. At the very least he knew his captain wouldn’t judge him for any emotions that were exposed tonight. He had to stop acting like this. If there was anyone he could trust...it would be his t’hy’la. Breathing in deeply Grimmjow gathered himself and turned to face his captain, mirroring his pose. With natural, unpracticed ease his hand formed the salute of his people and held it up with bravado he certainly didn’t feel. Ichigo was beaming. With an almost indiscernible struggle Ichigo performed the salute back. _Technically_ the salute wasn’t necessary. They could do this with just the two fingers, but Grimmjow didn’t even bother trying to explain it, distracted by his captain’s rough hand hovering in front of his. The Vulcan swallowed as he studied the captain’s hand one last time. He couldn’t believe a hand that rough and, frankly, barbaric was going to touch his. Not only was Ichigo human but he was a human with flesh callused from difficult and violent physical labor. To top it off he was emotional, too. The very person Vulcans avoided. They were stupid, pretentious bastards for thinking that life without someone like Kurosaki would be better.

“You, ah, it would be easier if you, um, turned your hand to the side. It is, um, it is more like me touching the back of your hand rather than a high five, Captain,” Grimmjow said.

“Was that a joke?”

“Doubtful, Captain. I am a little too distracted to be making jokes at the moment.”

“You mean stressed?”

Grimmjow’s eyelid twitch. He shot his captain an annoyed glare. “Why are you so insistent on upsetting me, Captain?”

That blessed, wicked grin made another appearance. “I like seeing who you are when you don’t hide behind your professional mask.”

“You would see it sooner if you did not insist on—.”

His breath hitched with a gasp when rough calluses scratched the back of his hand. The tough skin sparked flashes of fire across his pale flesh that seeped deep into his muscle and spread throughout his body until every last atom was aflame. The hungry fire burned the air from his lungs and left him breathless as Ichigo’s hand crept further along his, just barely hovering above the Vulcan’s skin. His heart was going to shatter his ribs. Grimmjow was sure of it. Oh Shariel, _please_ refrain from taking his soul at this moment. He had to experience this before he could ever allow himself to die. Ichigo’s hand continued its journey. A thumb traced the wrinkles of his knuckles. Fingers stroked the curve of his thumb and teased his wrist. It was so effortless and elegant, almost as if it were practiced.

Ichigo’s body shifted closer until their knees bumped, their legs flush against each other. The blonde leaned forward and pressed his lips to Grimmjow’s ear, kissing the lobe before he spoke. “I might have exaggerated how limited my knowledge of your people is,” he could hear the smile in his captain’s voice, “I’ve been devouring Vulcan literature since the moment I met you, Grimmjow Jaegerjaquez. I wanted to know everything about you. About your culture.”

“D-do you not do that with everyone, C-Captain?” His studies weren’t foreign to him. Everyone knew their captain took pride in his people and wanted to be close to all of them. He always made sure he had knowledge of each crewmembers’ meaning of home.

A chuckle tickled his ear and cast shivers down his spine. “I typically don’t perform extensive research on the courting rituals of my crewmen,” Ichigo admitted.

A flash of worry momentarily flickered through his mind. No, he shouldn’t worry about his captain knowing of pon farr. That aspect of Vulcan culture was well hidden from outsiders. His people never spoke of the shameful occurrence and therefore never wrote of the subject. There’s no way his captain could know of it. The meaning behind their _hands_ , however, was not as protected. “Captain—.”

His voice vanished. Skin to skin, there was nothing between them. The captain’s hand rested on the back of his and traced the contours of his fingers and stroked prominent veins, slowly brushing his rough and heated hands back and forth. Fingers curled over his bare wrist, feeling the rapid pulse beneath, before slowly making their way along the Vulcan’s arm and pulling a gasp from a quiet throat. Grimmjow’s teeth sank deep into his bottom lips and swallowed the rest of his disgustingly needy noises before they could burst free from his tongue. Earthshaking kisses littered his jaw and trailed down to his neck. Teeth grazed skin just above the collar of his shirt and Ichigo pulled back. Fingers grabbed handfuls of his hair and cradled the back of his head, pulling him forward until their lips nearly touched and their foreheads kissed.

“I want you, Grimmjow,” Ichigo whispered.

Shit. Grimmjow’s shoulders slumped and a whine tumbled from his weak throat. “Captain—.”

“But I don’t want to overwhelm you.” Grimmjow met brown eyes in surprise. The blonde smiled crookedly. His hand slowly slipped down Grimmjow’s arm and clasped his hand lovingly, winding their fingers together in a tangle of emotions. “If we have to take this slowly, that’s fine with me. I can wait as long as you need me to. I don’t want you to push yourself for my sake. If we need to follow Vulcan traditions then that’s what we’ll do. Okay?” Ichigo asked.

Pink lips brushed his knuckles and Grimmjow frowned. No. That isn’t what he wanted at all. He didn’t want to take this slowly or be careful or whatever the hell else his captain just said. Fuck being cautious. He’s wanted his captain for so long he wasn’t going to wait another minute. He wasn’t that frail. Push himself for Kurosaki’s sake? Please. He wasn’t that self sacrificing.

“Grimmjow? Are you—mmphh!”

The Vulcan smashed his lips against Ichigo’s, his hands reaching out to pull the man closer by any means necessary. His fingers caught the man’s yellow uniform and yanked, stretching the fabric as he pressed Ichigo’s body to his, clinging to him as if his life depended upon it. Ichigo tried to stop him, muffled words escaping their kiss and hands pushing at his shoulder and tugging on his hair, but he refused to release him. Slowly he shuffled onto his bed and pulled Ichigo with him, muffling any arguments with a deep thrust of his tongue and a squeeze of his wandering hand. Their kiss didn’t break until Grimmjow laid on his back, his hair splayed out on thick pillows like ocean waves, with Ichigo straddling his hips and towering over him, a tanned hand on each side of his head to pin him in place. With a harsh bite to Ichigo’s lip their kiss fell apart with combined gasps, both men as desperate for air as they were for release.

“Gr-Grimmjow! I said you don’t—.”

“Shut up, Captain.” Grimmjow shivered at his own words. Of course there was no venom in his tone, and there was even a smile on his face, but he had never spoken to his captain in such a way. At least, not since they first met. “You obviously know nothing about Vulcan rituals if you think we take sex slowly and with caution. My kind were savages once, Captain, and some of those instincts remain. We can bury everything else, but that animalistic desire to devour another person in body, mind, heart, and soul is a carnal emotion we can never master,” Grimmjow said.

Ichigo swallowed, clearly shaken by his words and seeing Grimmjow in a new light. The Vulcan released a wide smirk and bucked his hips, grinding his trapped erection against his captain’s rear. It was wrong and disrespectful in so many ways, but that knowledge only made him harder. At least his captain was enjoying it; if that moan was anything to go by. “If you want me, Captain, then _take me_. Do not **dare** ruin this,” he warned.

Contemplating was a pastime of Kurosaki’s. When it came to risking his life he never stopped to debate the dangers, but when it came to the safety and interests of others suddenly he had nothing but time. It was irksome. His captain never spoke of his depression but everyone aboard knew of it. They were all trained to recognize the signs. Living inside a ship without family for comfort wore down on the human heart and risked dangerous thoughts. Grimmjow was honestly surprised they allowed someone with chronic depression to captain a ship. Of course, there was a small possibility that he didn’t become depressed until after he was assigned or they hadn’t noticed the warnings surrounding him. All in all he was a great captain and Grimmjow would rather die than serve under someone else, but that didn’t stop him from worrying.

“Grimm, I just...I don’t want to take advantage of you. You mean so much to me. You’re the best first officer a captain could ask for and...I don’t want to ruin that,” Ichigo confessed.

Heated hands framed his face. Thumbs stroked his cheeks and Grimmjow felt himself melting under the touch. Those soft eyes were going to be the death of him.

“The only thing you risk ruining, Captain, is my boner,” Grimmjow replied with a smirk.

Ichigo chuckled with a snort and mirrored the expression. His thumbs brushed high cheekbones one last time before fingers snaked back into Grimmjow’s long, untamed hair. The Vulcan groaned as his captain pulled on the blue locks, forcing his head to tilt back ever so slightly, and waited in anticipation when Ichigo leaned in. A soft, gentle peck touched his lips in a chaste kiss and brown eyes searched blue.

“I love you, Grimmjow,” Ichigo murmured.

What a sappy shithead. “Prove it, Kurosaki.”

He saw a flash of a smile before he found himself wrapped in another passionate kiss. At first all they did was moan into each other’s mouths and pull on hair, trying to merge their bodies in a way that wasn’t scientifically sound. Their bravery and lust grew with time, encouraging their hands to wander and tug at their wrinkled and stretched uniforms. If anyone saw them in these clothes they would know immediately what they had done; and Grimmjow enjoyed that notion more than he should. Sleeping with the captain wasn’t something he should brag about, but did he ever want to. Getting Ichigo’s clothes off was easy. Their kiss was hardly interrupted by the golden shirt and even less by the black undershirt beneath. Grimmjow’s wasn’t as easy while laying on his back. He almost considered telling Ichigo to forget it and keep going to speed up the process, but when rough hands slipped under his shirt and took hold of his waist he was so glad he had kept his mouth shut. Kurosaki’s wandering hands pushed his shirt up inch by inch. Fingers greedily taking everything the Vulcan’s body had to offer. They memorized each muscle, each rib and marking on the pale surface, remembering the body below him as if he were an uncharted solar system. Ichigo filled Grimmjow’s mouth with appreciative moans as he absorbed his partner, consuming him by touch until all Grimmjow could feel were those hands burning his skin. Unfortunately their kiss was interrupted briefly by his blue shirt and the offending material was thrown to the floor in banishment, only to be reconnected with the added element of their heaving chests and carved stomachs. The Vulcan disguised his curse as a moan and wrapped his arms around his captain, tugging his body closer. He could feel the captain’s heartbeat against his chest, the rapid beat drumming against his flesh. Intoxicating.

“Captain—.”

“Yeah, I know.”

Nimble fingers tugged at Grimmjow trousers. The button popped and the zipper pulled down with skill than the Vulcan hadn’t expected. Impatient as always, Ichigo ignored removing Grimmjow’s pants completely and palmed the man’s cock through his tight underwear. Grimmjow hissed against pink lips and rocked his hips, grinding against the strong hand.

“Fuck. You’re huge,” Ichigo groaned, breaking their kiss to pant in Grimmjow’s ear, “Shit. I want you in my mouth so badly.”

Pale limbs jerked and clung to satin sheets at his words. A captain— _his_ captain, willing and _wishing_ to have a Vulcan’s dick on his tongue? Especially one under his own command? Unthinkable. Why would his captain put himself in such a vulnerable position?

“Ill-illogical, Captain,” Grimmjow stammered. The longer he clung to his mask the quicker he crumbled. He would love to completely let go and lose himself—but he doubted his captain could handle an unrestrained Vulcan in bed.

“Desire rarely is,” Ichigo replied.

A wet tongue traced the shell of his pierced ear and Grimmjow moaned. His body shook at the wonderful sensation as his nails raked across the man’s broad shoulders. Curses were moaned into his sensitive ears and the Vulcan bit his lip to hinder himself from making another incriminating sound. This was a _very_ dangerous situation. He needed to be careful. Get too carried away and he could hurt his captain—he could also finish before anything started. Both were highly undesirable.

“Y’know,” Ichigo began, pressing a kiss to the corner of Grimmjow’s jaw and leading a trail down his throat before slowly pulling away, “This is the first time I’ve ever seen you without a shirt.”

Fingers ghosted over the pale scars littered across golden skin and Grimmjow shivered. “Looking is not free. I am not trying to advertise myself.”

Ichigo chuckled and stroked the strip of skin on his hips that laid a hair’s breadth from the band of black slacks. Without a straight answer his captain somehow still understood his true feelings on the subject. “I never expected you to be the type that would feel ashamed of his scars and hide them,” he said.

Grimmjow studied him. “Could say the same to you, Captain.”

A twisted grimace obscured the blonde’s smile. Grimmjow had seen it a few times in passing but his view had always been obscured by an overly self conscious captain who scrambled to pull on a shirt or cover himself with a towel, and now he knew why. A gnarly scar rested upon his sternum, the skin red and rough in nature, surely something people would refuse to touch much less look at. Stemming from it was a massive burn. It enveloped his entire left pec and crawled onto his shoulder and then, from there, eased up his neck to the corner of his jaw where the scar ended. Grimmjow’s brow twitched as he reached out and brushed the bangs from Kurosaki’s eyes, tucking his orange hair behind his ear. The skin by his left eye had been burned, too, as well as his temple and ear. He never noticed that the tip was deformed. His captain had cleverly hidden the markings with his shaggy hair and a black turtleneck under his uniform but it wasn’t enough to conceal everything. It was merely enough to keep others from asking for the story that came along with it.

“I—.”

“I already told you that you do not owe me an answer, Captain,” Grimmjow interrupted, his face stern and serious, “That goes for any question I ask in any situation.”

He loved that smile so _fiercely_ it was frightening. He would slaughter planets to keep that smile on his face, although he knew that action would bring forth a reaction opposite to the one he desired. A faint gasp spilled from his lips. Hands traveled across his body again; one cupped his face and a thumb brushed his cheek, the other teased the band of his underwear.

“As much as you enjoy hiding it, Jaegerjaquez,” Ichigo murmured as their faces came within inches of one another, lips deathly close to touching, “That lovely heart of yours is half the reason why I love you.”

Before Grimmjow could gather words on his tongue his captain kissed him. His superior pressed their bodies together so tightly that it seemed they could never part, their kiss deepening with each stolen breath. Callused fingers bravely slipped under the Vulcan’s underwear and wrapped around his hard cock, stroking the science officer slowly and teasing all the right places. Their kiss broke when Grimmjow threw his head back and moaned, rocking his hips into his captain’s tight grip and shaking under the unexpected skill. Ichigo took this in stride and worshiped the Vulcan’s ear and jaw with gentle kisses and soft flicks of his tongue; then he continued to speak.

“You try so, _so_ hard to act as if no one here on this ship holds meaning to you...when in reality you cherish the lives of every single crewmen onboard. The capacity in which you care for others is astounding. I admire you for it,” Ichigo admitted.

“I do not—,” Grimmjow’s breath hitched when a tongue licked his adam’s apple and groaned as lips closed on the sensitive flesh and sucked, hard, “It is my job to...fuck...hah _shit_.”

Why did he ever bother to hide anything from his captain? The blonde wasn’t an idiot. In fact, Grimmjow had—without the consent of his captain or Starfleet—seen Kurosaki’s academy scores and that of education previous to it. His captain was nothing short of a genius. Grimmjow himself had only a few points on Kurosaki, and there was only one person who rivaled his own score. (Although Grimmjow would argue that one damn point was mere semantics.) Ever since he was assigned to the Enterprise he hadn’t been able to hide anything. Not where his captain was concerned. He read people far too easily and it was unnerving for numerous reasons, but it made him an excellent captain.

“You can hide your heart from everyone else, but not from me,” Ichigo whispered.

Grimmjow was dizzy. The hand on his cock was so _warm_ and _gentle_ and his body felt so oddly relaxed even while his skin burned from the molten body pinning him. His mind always got muddled around his captain and a situation like this was even worse. It’s why he didn’t even stop to think before blurting, “I do not wish to hide it from you.”

For once, he was glad he didn’t think things through. His captain looked as if he was bursting at the seams. Diamonds oozed from his brilliant smile and Grimmjow found it impossible not to smile back. He loved that smile more than life itself.

Ichigo pressed his lips to the Vulcan’s and drew back before their passion got the best of them. “I love you so much, Grimmjow,” Ichigo admitted, then immediately sealed their lips together in another searing kiss. The Vulcan hummed at the pleasant sensation. He wanted and _needed_ for the man to be closer. Pale fingers carded through firelight hair as Grimmjow pulled Ichigo closer and bucked his hips, thrusting into his captain’s fist and shivering. A growl slipped between Ichigo’s teeth and goosebumps swallowed Grimmjow’s yearning body. He never heard his captain make that noise before.

“You really don’t want me to go slowly, do you?” Ichigo ground out, jaw flexing as he resisted silencing Grimmjow with a kiss.

“You are holding back?” Grimmjow asked, truly surprised. Sure this situation wasn’t exactly wild, but it definitely wasn’t tame either.

A faint chuckle trickled from Ichigo’s lips. “You really have no idea how badly I want to ravish you, do you?”

“Ravish, Captain?” Damn his voice for gaining a nervous pitch.

“Ravish, my dear First Officer,” he confirmed.

Lips kissed his jaw as fingers hooked on the band of his trousers. Ichigo moved down slowly, marking the Vulcan’s body with love and attention while peeling the tight clothing from sculpted thighs until the blonde stood at the foot of the bed, pants in hand, and rendered Grimmjow completely naked. The hunger in those dark brown depths rivaled his own and he found himself unable to feel an ounce of shame. It was unsightly, but Grimmjow found himself spreading his legs apart, inviting his captain closer, and placed his whole body on display with a dramatic arch of his spine and roll of experienced hips. Those brown eyes were almost black. The severity of those expanding black pupils filled the starship captain with a dangerous aura. A possessive, _starving_ essence that wanted to consume him and belong to him—and only him—for the rest of eternity. Such domination typically annoyed Grimmjow because of the sheer ignorance of the ones trying to dominate him, but once again, his captain was different. Captain Kurosaki knew everything he was capable of and, in exchange, Grimmjow knew what his captain could achieve. To join Starfleet one has to go through rigorous training to accustom the body to battle and defense. To become a high ranking captain they needed intellect, instincts, and physical capability gained through harsh tests and experiences. For someone so young to be a captain spoke volumes on his strength and tenacity.

“Ravish...doesn’t even begin to cover all that I want to do to you, my ashayam,” Ichigo said, his voice a rocky rumble that betrayed the softness of his words.

 _Ashayam_. The Vulcan chewed on his lower lip as he replayed the word in his mind and melted at the sound of his captain’s voice. He hadn’t been lying. He really had studied Vulcan culture.

“Ashayam, Captain?” Grimmjow asked.

Brown eyes met blue and they both smiled.

“Ashau nash-veh tu,” Ichigo said. His fingers started to undo his pants, studying Grimmjow as if he couldn’t look away.

He knew he was blushing. It was embarrassing, but what was so much worse was the thrilled smile on his lips. “Your pronunciation is shit, my t’hy’la.”

Ichigo’s breath hitched and his fingers fumbled. Grimmjow watched with curious eyes as his captain shivered, and once his limbs stilled, he watched those hands scramble to remove his pants faster, his desperation increased.

“Please. Say it again,” Ichigo whispered.

Like the shitty half-Vulcan he was, he couldn’t help but smile. Deep down Kurosaki was, is, and always will be a soft hearted romantic. Grimmjow pushed himself onto his elbows and made sure his captain was looking at him before he spoke. “T’hy’la, the one who holds the greatest importance in my life,” he said without a shred of hesitation. Grimmjow was more sure about this than anything else, even his own existence.

His captain shook once again with a low moan and kicked the rest of his clothes from his body. The Vulcan swallowed. Gorgeous. Perfection. _Godly_. This was his captain. Nothing hidden, everything shared, all indiscernible flaws that only Kurosaki could see laid out for Vulcan eyes. It didn’t matter how many had seen this exact sight before him, what mattered is that he was going to be the last to ever see it. _His._ He only hoped his captain felt the same way.

“I want you,” Ichigo began, swallowing thickly as his fingers twitched at his sides, impatient, “I’ve wanted you for so long, Grimmjow.”

Asking permission again. His captain really didn’t understand that he wasn’t delicate. “I am already yours, Ichigo.”

His words held an immediate effect on his captain—particularly the use of his name. With incredible speed, speed that Grimmjow never thought a human could possess, Ichigo joined their bodies together and silenced any possible words with a crushing kiss. The boiling atmosphere of Vulcan was nothing compared to the heat their two bodies produced. He could barely breathe, and he didn't care to fix it. Ichigo stole every last invisible mass of air from his lungs and he wanted his captain to have it. Everything he was, everything he had to offer, it all belonged to Ichigo Kurosaki. A human. Grimmjow moaned when Ichigo's hips rocked forward. The cock throbbing against his thigh was _massive_. His captain made a big deal about his size, but the blonde was so much bigger. At least in length. Two inches? Something like that. All he knew was that he wanted that monster inside of him.

“Grimmjow, do you have--.”

He pulled a small bottle from his pillowcase and held it up. “Here.”

Ichigo blinked. When the man started to smirk, Grimmjow knew he made a mistake.

“Why do you have that so readily available, Lieutenant?” Ichigo asked coyly.

Grimmjow scowled but the frown didn't hide the blush on his cheeks. That only seemed to excite his captain more. “Why ask me? You already seem to know, Captain.”

Smug asshole. He normally liked that aspect of his captain’s personality, but not when it was directed at him.

“Do you touch yourself a lot?” Ichigo murmured.

“No.” _Yes_.

“Do you think of someone while you do it?”

“No, Captain.” **_Yes_**.

“Do you think of me?”

Grimmjow kept his mouth shut. If he were to even attempt to lie Kurosaki would know the truth. Although, by the look on Ichigo's face it seemed staying quiet wasn't helping him either.

“Where do you touch yourself?” Ichigo's voice was deep and husky. The exact voice Grimmjow had imagined many, _many_ times whispering in his ear, spilling filthy secret wishes the Vulcan wanted from angelic pink lips. He hadn't thought that voice was real. Knowing that it _was_ and for _him_...fuck that was enough to make precum leak from his cock at an embarrassing rate. He had been so distracted that he hadn't realized his captain had taken the bottle of lube from his hand. “Do you touch yourself here?”

Slick fingers pressed against his entrance and teased the sensitive hole and ripped a surprised moan from Grimmjow’s throat. His spine arched off the bed and his hips ground down on the invasive fingers. The lube was cold, but Ichigo’s fingers were on _fire_. Those callused fingertips felt even better _there_ than they had anywhere else on his body. He wanted them inside him. _Desperately_.

“Well? Do y—.”

“Yes! Yes, I do!” Grimmjow admitted in a whining rush, “I finger fuck myself while thinking of you and your hands and that _goddamn voice_. I fall apart at the thought of you touching me. I want it. Stop being a shithead and _give it to me_.”

He had a nagging suspicion in the back of his mind that he was going to regret that confession in the morning, but for the moment he couldn’t care less. Especially since those words pulled a possessive growl from his captain’s throat and his legs were pushed further apart.

“Talking to your captain like that is a punishable offense, you know,” Ichigo purred heatedly in his ear, and grinned when Grimmjow shivered, “If I weren’t so eager to feel my fingers stretch out that tight hole of yours I’d make you stretch yourself for me.”

Grimmjow bit his lip as another whimper squeezed through his throat. He felt his legs twitch and spread further apart at Ichigo’s words. He would’ve done that without argument. To be honest, he would do anything Ichigo asked of him and do so blindly. Grimmjow wasn’t very trusting of others, but Ichigo was one of two exceptions.

“Who knew my bloodthirsty first officer was such a whore?” Ichigo mocked, his voice light and playful so his words couldn’t be taken as an insult. Grimmjow didn’t care if he was trying to be insulting. He was a whore, but only for him. His captain and no one else.

“Spread yourself for me, Grimm,” Ichigo whispered before capturing his lips in a slow kiss.

The Vulcan moaned and did as told. He kissed his captain back, matching the sluggish pace, and reached down to spread his cheeks with a violent blush on his face. Exposing himself like this to his captain...fuck, he really was a whore.

“Beautiful,” Ichigo breathed.

The satisfied buzz that bubbled over his body lasted briefly when an anxious thrill raced through his veins. Hot fingers pressed against his entrance and pushed in. Teeth sliced into his bottom lip to mute the loud moan ripping through his throat. Ichigo was gentle and kind, easing his finger in slowly and pausing when he noticed the Vulcan wasn't breathing.

“Grimm? You doing okay?” Ichigo asked.

Grimmjow sucked in a deep breath and released it, shaking. “I am fine.”

“You sure? You weren't breathing,” Ichigo studied him, “You still aren't.”

Grimmjow forced himself to breathe again; brief inhale, short exhale. His fingers dug deeper into his own skin and he clenched down on the intruding finger. _Shit_. A weak groan echoed in Grimmjow's throat and he tried to sink down deeper on the digit. “Please. I need more of you,” he whispered, “This is torture. I do not care if it hurts. I need you in me.”

Brown eyes studied blue, almost unable to see the brilliant color from his dark, low lids and expanding pupils. The blonde smiled sweetly. His captain kissed his forehead to soothe him. “Just a little bit longer, ashayam. I don't want to hurt you, but I promise I won't torture you anymore.”

He wasn't given a chance to argue. The single digit pulled out and pushed back in at an easy pace; then a second finger joined, the two thrusting and scissoring in unison. Ichigo's lips praised his body with each thrust. Kisses sprinkled his skin in methodical waves. First, they were on his neck, the Vulcan's gasps vibrating against pink lips. Next, they dotted his chest, praising scars and nipping hardened nipples. The fingers dug deeper and _deeper_ , pulling more and more, louder noises from him. All too soon the electric pleasure became too much and Grimmjow released himself to clutched at the sheets, his hips rising to meet each thrust. No one had done this to him before. Prep wasn't sexy. It was a formality most partners rushed through that often left people like himself feeling the sting of pain rather than the buzz of pleasure. Ichigo was different. He took his time to make Grimmjow comfortable. He kept the fire between them burning by praising his body and enticing embarrassing sounds. It was almost overstimulating. If this was what a loving partner was like, he refused to have anything less from now on. Teeth nibbled on his jaw, then his earlobe, and when a third finger was added Grimmjow found himself carding pale fingers through orange hair. He could come from this alone. In fact he might. If Ichigo didn't stop soon, that fire boiling in his belly was going to consume everything.

“Ich...Ichigo,” Grimmjow struggled to control his tongue and stammer anything beside pants, “I-I am...hah! I am close. If…if you do not stop...I am gonna come.”

Even though it's what he wanted, Grimmjow whimpered when those fingers were removed and immediately felt empty. It was even worse when Ichigo pulled away. At least he would have a moment to collect himself. Maybe then he won’t come just from his captain putting his dick in him.

“Do you have any protection?” Ichigo asked. He was red in the face and panting just as hard as Grimmjow was.

“What? You think I am a dirty Vulcan?” he teased with a grin.

Ichigo smiled back. “Not at all, but I'm a filthy human and I don't want Uryū to bitch at me if he finds out we fucked without a condom.”

Grimmjow doubted the doctor wouldn't kill Ichigo period. For a bright person the captain was stupid when it came to other people's feelings. More accurately, feelings people had for him. He thought they didn’t exist, to be frank.

“First drawer in the desk,” Grimmjow said.

“You keep them in your desk?” Ichigo asked as he made the short trip to and back and smirked, “Do you get lucky often, my ashayam?”

 _Shariel_ he loved that word on the captain's tongue.

“No. Not since I met you.”

That was more honest than he intended to be.

Ichigo's smile was dazzling. Grimmjow's heart skipped. Once again he was glad he hadn't filtered himself. That smile was worth everything.

“Oh? Are you saying you haven't been with anyone in a year?” Ichigo asked. He placed the edge of the condom between his teeth and tore the wrapper. An orange brow arched and he held it up. “Pink?”

Grimmjow shrugged. “It is a good color.”

Ichigo nodded in agreement and tossed the wrapper aside. “You didn’t answer my question.”

The blonde approached slowly and Grimmjow gulped. He wasn’t sure why, but admitting that he hadn’t gotten laid in a year seemed risky. Ichigo’s knees struck the mattress and climbed on, slipping back into his position from before.

“Well?” Ichigo asked. He rolled the condom on with a frightening amount of ease and Grimmjow found himself blushing at the sight. It was a shame he couldn’t have that uncut cock in all its glory, but it wasn’t like this will be the only time they fuck around. He shivered at the thought. He couldn’t believe that they were going to have sex in the first place. The mere notion of this going to be a repeated occurrence was hard to wrap his mind around.

“It has been a year and three months,” Grimmjow admitted.

Ichigo not only smiled but _chuckled_ as he squeezed lubricant onto his member and stroked himself. The blonde towered over Grimmjow and planted a hand beside his head as he continued to touch himself, hips twitching and panting loudly. “Guess I’ve got a lot of lost time to make up for,” he purred.

This human was going to kill him. He couldn’t ask for anyone better to take his life.

They kissed again and his eyes fluttered closed. Pale fingers brushed through orange hair and tucked loose strands behind the scarred ear, wanting to see more of that beautiful face. The fizzling heat between them reignited as Ichigo pushed his tongue into his mouth, tasting and taking whatever he wanted until Grimmjow mewled in need. Wow. He never thought he could be this pathetic.

“You ready?” Ichigo asked against his lips.

All self destructive thoughts vanished and he groaned. “ _Yes_. Please, I need you.”

Ichigo dove in for another kiss. That _tongue_. It was merciless. Grimmjow felt violated just from the muscle probing and searching as it pleased. He shouldn’t enjoy it, but he did. The kiss broke and a string of saliva connected glistening lips.

“You’re so gorgeous, you know that?” Ichigo murmured, tongue swiping across his lips, “You’re always so _beautiful_. Hell, you come out of a fight covered in blood with a broken nose and I still can’t stop thinking about how much I want you in my arms.”

Grimmjow smiled crookedly. “I think you are just into some really kinky stuff.”

The blonde laughed and goosebumps consumed the Vulcan. He loved that sound. No one ever got to hear it. They saw his smiles. They heard him chuckle, scoff, and snort but never laugh. Ichigo laughed and it was for _him_. His heart was going to burst right out of him if the man did that again.

“While that might be true, I would rather you take the compliment.” Ichigo’s fingers tangled themselves in blue hair as his his other hand slipped down his body, and then disappeared. Moments later the warm tip of Ichigo’s cock pressed against his entrance and Grimmjow’s breath hitched. “Make sure to breathe, Grimm.”

“Will you stop treating me like a virgin and—.”

Okay. He understood why Ichigo ordered him to breathe. This was much bigger than a finger. Bigger than _three_ fingers. Grimmjow clenched his jaw as his back arched with each inch pushed inside him. He quickly lost control of his voice and covered his mouth with both hands in an attempt to silence himself. His gasp was muffled, but the loud and embarrassing moan wasn't as artfully hidden. Blue eyes squeezed shut. Ichigo was _big_. That fact was obvious before that monster was inside him, but he hadn't really taken into account how that would feel, nor did he consider that he had never taken anything this big before. Here's the problem. It felt _fantastic_. Ichigo prepared him well enough that it only stung a little. Tears appeared in the corners of his eyes and he held his breath to snuff his unprofessional sounds. He had never felt this open. No one had stretched him this widely. Nothing had ever reached that _deep_. Grimmjow was certain his captain's hips would never reach him, but when the man's pelvis pressed against his ass he had to bite his tongue and squeezed his mouth tightly. **_Full_**. He had never felt this full before. Tan hands rubbed thick trembling thighs to soothe the Vulcan. Grimmjow shivered.

“You need to breathe, Grimm,” Ichigo said, a hand reached out to tug on a stubborn pale wrist, “Move your hand.”

He couldn't. Grimmjow shook his head with a resistant whine in his throat. He couldn't let his captain see him like this. Since his pon farr was months away he figured he could control himself better. Sex with other people wasn't like this. Of course…none of them had been his captain. His t'hy'la. Grimmjow's thighs squeezed Ichigo's hips. He was going to lose himself.

“Grimmjow? You have to talk to me. I won't go any further until you do,” Ichigo stated with a huff.

Shit. He as serious when he grumbled like that. He didn't want Ichigo to see him like this but he didn't want this to end either. With a reluctant whine Grimmjow removed his hands and released his tongue.

“You have to breathe too, man,” Ichigo said.

Breathe in, breathe out. Inhale, exhale. Ichigo still looked concerned.

“Do we need to stop?” Ichigo asked.

Grimmjow struck his captain with a hard glare. “Pull out and I will kill you.” He slapped a hand over his mouth again, meeting Ichigo's wide eyes with his own. He just threatened his captain. Shariel, end him now before Ichigo did.

Sensitive ears were blessed with a kiss and Grimmjow stared at his captain in wonder.

“I wouldn't dream of it. I just wanted to make sure you were okay. I didn't want you to pass out on me,” Ichigo said honestly.

Captain Kurosaki was always looking out for him and the crew. Was it possible for him to be selfish? “I am fine. You are just…really huge.” Not the best articulated sentence he had uttered, but he got his point across.

“I know how you feel. I'm not sure if I can fit this monster in me,” the blonde squeezed Grimmjow's cock for emphasis, “but I'll be damned if I don't try.”

The green blush returned to his face in a hustled fury. In him...Ichigo was talking about bottoming for _him_. They really were going to do this more than once.

“You think you're ready for me to move?” Ichigo asked.

 ** _Yes!_** He wanted to scream his answer from the rooftops. Instead he merely nodded. As always, his captain smiled. The man kissed him for what felt like the billionth time—not that he was complaining—before sitting up. Rough hands carefully held his wide hips and that's when everything really sank in. He was about to have sex with his captain. Amazing sex, no doubt, but it was still with his superior officer. What was he _doing_? Starfleet was going to lose their minds if they found out. Low ranking and non-ranking officers could have all the sex they wanted with each other. He and Kurosaki were different. Kurosaki was his captain. He was the first officer. They could only get away with a relationship if they were married. Starfleet was going to lose it. They might even be transferred—Grimmjow’s breath caught. They could be separated. He could be forced to work under someone else...call someone else captain. He couldn’t stand that. He wanted _his_ captain, _his_ t'hy'la. The word calmed Grimmjow's rising anxieties and he allowed himself to relax. T'hy'la. This wasn't just anyone. It was his t'hy'la. It wasn’t a legitimate marriage, but it was enough to keep them linked. Even if they were separated...Kurosaki was, and always shall be, _his_. Grimmjow chewed on his own lip. _His_. **_His_** Ichigo pulled his hips back gradually and snapped them forward.

“ _Haa!_ ” Grimmjow cried out and his hands slammed down on the mattress. His fingers clawed at the burgundy sheets and stars burst behind his eyes.

“Fuck. You're so _tight_ ,” Ichigo cursed as he bit his lip.

Grimmjow clenched down at those words and his buzzing body vibrated from the responding curse. He loved that voice. His lids dropped as a lewd haze began to cloud his mind. He needed to hear it again. “Ichigo, _please_ , move,” he whispered, “I need you to move.”

Ichigo cursed again and his grip on the Vulcan's hips tightened. His thrusts started out soft and shallow. It caused enough friction to shorten their breaths. To spring a light sheen of sweat on their skin. To build the hunger inside them until they were famished and desperate. The first hard thrust took Grimmjow by surprise. They had stuck with the slow burning thrusts for so long that when Ichigo's hips snapped forward he cried out. Ichigo's hips jerked at the sound and impaled Grimmjow so deeply that he swore he could feel the human's cock bulging in his stomach.

“Ah! Hahh, _fuck_. Ich...Ichigo, do that again,” Grimmjow breathed.

Ichigo did as asked and slammed into the Vulcan.

“ **AH!** ” Grimmjow scrambled to cover his mouth as his back arched and trembled from the receding pleasure.

There's no way he was going to survive this in one piece. Ichigo's hips pulled back and snapped forward again, this time setting a steady, uninterrupted pace. Grimmjow didn't bother hiding his obnoxious moans. Everything was on fire. His skin burned with as much deadly passion as his bones and, oddly, he loved it. The blonde continued to piston his hips, thrusting deep and hard and pulling a moan from Grimmjow with each movement, his legs strangling lean hips with each strike. Ichigo was too far away to touch. Grimmjow’s fingers opted for the sheets instead, clawing, twisting, and tearing at the red silk. Shameful cries of pleasure fell from his open mouth and he couldn’t stop them, the same way he couldn’t stop talking.

“F-faster. _Ah!_ H-harder. **Ngh**. Ich...Ichigo, please! I need more. I want _more_ ,” Grimmjow whimpered.

“Fuck, man. I didn’t expect you to be so loud,” Ichigo purred. That grin still did things to him, even now. “Shit. Your body is so fucking hot. I feel like I'm gonna melt. _Hah_! Fuck. Fuck, and you're still so _tight_.”

Fingers wrapped around his leaking cock and stroked him in tune with each thrust. Grimmjow didn't have a chance to stop his moan. His hips bucked into that rough palm and his member twitched. Those callused hands were as sexy on his dick as they were on his hand.

“So responsive. So— _ha!_ —so beautiful. So _loud_ ,” Ichigo cooed.

He wanted to stop. This was destroying his image. He was certain people in the hall—if not the _entire ship_ —could hear every word he said, heard every moan and scream. No one would take him seriously ever again. He would be nothing more than the Vulcan who got dicked down so hard by his captain that he lost all logic. Grimmjow licked his lips and started meeting Ichigo’s bucks with his own. Despite that reality, he couldn’t care. Logically he knew he should, but his reasoning was gone. As the fire in the pit of his stomach grew and expanded the consciousness of his mind ebbed away. The erotic haze shrouding his mind slowly suffocated him and it wasn’t until a certain angled thrust, a harsh strike to the bundle of nerves inside him, that all thoughts were ripped from his skull and his mind shattered.

“ _ **YES!**_ ” Grimmjow screamed, his back lifting completely off the bed in a poetic arch, “ _There!_ Ichigo. There, _please_!”

“Shit. That’s fucking hot,” Ichigo groaned.

The hand on his cock disappeared and a whimpered question built on his tongue, but the words vanished as callused hands framed his face and stole his breath with a kiss. Grimmjow moaned into the captain’s mouth, overjoyed to have the man back in his embrace. Starving hands combed through orange hair and brushed over tanned skin. Nails scratched muscular shoulders in a vain attempt pull the man closer. His thick legs locked on Ichigo’s waist and his heels dug into the blonde’s lower back, trying with all his might to push Ichigo in further, deeper. _Yes_. This is what he wanted. Ichigo in his arms. The man breathing on his skin and moaning his name. His pale hands cupped Ichigo’s cheeks as he deepened their kiss, tilting his head and teasing the man’s tongue with his own. No space between them. Unified. _One_.

He hadn’t meant to do it. Honestly. Normally he could control himself. Normally it was harder to connect with a person on a telepathic level. Apparently, that didn't apply to his t’hy’la. Their minds merged as if it were natural, as if that’s how they were supposed to be. The shift had been so indiscernible that he hadn’t realized that the thoughts in his head weren’t his own; until he heard his name.

Grimmjo _w_.

The Vulcan gasped and his eyes shot open. The name wasn’t special. He didn’t even like it, but the way it sparkled like expensive diamonds, as if it— _he_ —was priceless, in his mind caused his heart to skip a beat.

Grimmjow. Grimmjow, _Grimmjow_ , **_Grimmjow_**.

The word sounded so beautiful. The voice that spoke the name made it sound as if it were a prized jewel. A beloved person. **_Loved_**. Grimmjow shivered and his powers surged, diving deeper to chase that admiration.

Ichigo faltered and moaned. “Shit. Fuck, Grimm,” he moaned, “It feels...shit, feels like you’re fucking my head. _Fuck_.”

Grimmjow knew exactly what he was talking about. The man wasn't appalled by their connection. They had melded their minds before many times, but not like this. It was as easy as breathing. It was like they were joining into one. That notion would terrify even a Vulcan, but Ichigo was as eager as he was. Chasing that pleasure, that love, that _completion_. Grimmjow allowed his power to surge. He forced his way deeper into the man's mind and enjoyed every moan Ichigo released and the way his hips stuttered. It wasn't as invasive as it seemed. Ichigo was letting him search as far into his past as he chose, but Grimmjow was only concerned about the present. He wanted to know exactly what the blonde was feeling. Ichigo moaned again and started to shake, his thrusts faltering. His brown eyes were dark and smouldering with lust. Out of breath and overwhelmed. Falling apart and loving it. Grimmjow wasn't doing any better. He pushed his thoughts onto Ichigo, noting his whimper, to take in more of his captain's. He couldn't help but gasp. Love swarmed him, surrounding him and protecting him as memories of himself plagued his mind. They weren't his memories. It was the wrong perspective. This is what Ichigo saw in him from the first day they met. The beginning was rocky, flooded with uncertainty and aggravation from their hostility toward each other. That changed after their first serious mission. Ichigo's concern for him was mind blowing. Terrified that Grimmjow would be hurt. Admiration of Grimmjow's strength and agility as they fought side by side. Giddy relief when they survived vicious Klingons, and a foreign, blooming feeling when Grimmjow smiled at him for the first time. Emotions whirled by quickly as he continued to search, dying to feel everything the human could offer. Everything bloomed from that moment. A feeling of friendship and trust. A fluttering crush. A humiliating dash of lust. Then love. Everything was drenched in the emotion. Even memories of the two fighting were encased in it. Grimmjow groaned and rocked his hips, eager to continue their friction with the emotions buzzing under his skin.

“Fuck,” Ichigo gasped. His eyes were still glazed and they stared at noting, too caught up in Grimmjow's emotions and thoughts to digest the world around him. The wise action to take would be to back off and give the man some space, but he couldn't do that just yet. He needed Ichigo to feel something first. Grimmjow shifted his fingers on a freckled cheek. His consciousness skimmed Ichigo's mind until he found an opening. There.

 _T'hy'la_.

Ichigo moaned and curses flowed from his tongue like a raging waterfall as his hips bucked and cock twitched. There. Now he knew everything.

“I can't...I can’t hold back anymore,” Ichigo spoke. His arms still shook.

Grimmjow smiled. “I never asked you to.”

Lips smashed against his in a violent, passionate fury. Rough hands held his face to deepen their kiss as his thrusts transformed into something hard and animalistic. Each thrust hit his prostate head on and, in turn, caused Grimmjow to scream. He pulled on orange hair as his back arched. Arms fastened around his waist holding him in place and keeping him at that perfect angle. Teeth carved into his throat, marking him and claiming ownership, and his nails raked down a sunkissed, muscular back. He was close. So _close_. The speed of which Ichigo hit his prostate left him breathless. It was impossible for him to breathe, impossible for him to scream, only shake as the heat in his stomach boiled.

Then a hand grabbed his cock and stroked him, and Ichigo spoke into his ear in a growled, gasping whisper, “Come for me, Grimmjow. I want to see it, ashayam.”

That’s all he needed. With a weak cry Grimmjow’s body jolted as the world turned white. Long ropes of cum stained his chest as Ichigo milked it from him, grinding his hips to rub that spot over and over again as he came. His body twitched and jerked with every little touch and he couldn’t stop shaking, his high seeming to be limitless even when he collapsed. The overstimulation enticed seminal fluid to leak from his cock and he whimpered, conflicted between wanting more and needing to rest.

“Fuck, _Grimmjow_ ,” Ichigo moaned and held the Vulcan tighter, “You’re gorgeous.”

He barely had one foot on reality but Grimmjow felt his skin burn with a vibrant blush. He captain wouldn’t stop complimenting him. None of his previous partners did that. They didn’t care about him, they only wanted to get off. His captain was different. Captain Kurosaki was his t’hy’la. Captain Kurosaki was _his_. The Vulcan groaned and his body jolted as he mumbled Ichigo’s name under his breath in an endless loop. His hands cradled the human’s face and brought him close, then interrupted Ichigo’s loving mumbling with a kiss. The position guided his captain to lay against him and sweat and cum smeared between them, soiling both of their bodies. It must have made a pleasant sight for his captain. Appearing ruined and vulnerable, rambling his captain’s name over and over again even as the man stole his breath with every kiss. Hugging Ichigo as if to merge their bodies. Grimmjow’s fingers brushed over the captain’s face, tenderly touching the scars, and pushed through again, merging their minds one last time. That was all it took for Ichigo to reach his climax.

With crude curses Ichigo’s hips stuttered and he slammed them forward with a hungry growl, biting and splitting Grimmjow’s lip as he moaned. He trembled when Ichigo climaxed, squeezing down on the throbbing member inside of him and whimpering because _Shariel_ he wanted to feel his captain stuff him with cum. He should have insisted that they didn’t need a condom. They had physicals recently and Ishida covered _everything_ as a precautionary measure. It was sweet that Ichigo was concerned and wanted to be safe but—

Ichigo’s hips pushed deeper and sparks ignited behind his eyes. He quickly covered his mouth and cried out, shaking uncontrollably from being filled and stuffed with cum. Grimmjow moaned behind his hands and his eyes rolled back. The condom must have broke and neither of them noticed. **_Yes_**. He had never been thankful for faulty protection but now he was _elated_. Each pulse of Ichigo’s cock spilled more and more of his cum inside the Vulcan and _wouldn’t stop_. Was it normal for a human to come this much? He doubted it should be physically possible. _Shariel_ , he really couldn’t care. It felt too good. His captain’s cum was so _hot_ and kept stuffing him until he felt _full_. He clamped down on the slowly fading erection and whined. It had to be leaking out. There was too much for him to keep inside.

“Shit. Shit,” Ichigo gasped as his arms shook, lustful brown eyes staring at him, “Grimmjow...Grimmjow I need to kiss you. _Please_.”

How could he ignore his captain when the man pleaded for him like that? Grimmjow dropped his hands and was immediately swept into a deep, loving kiss. There were too many emotions. The emotions in his body and the emotions Ichigo pushed onto him, it was all too much, and it _hurt_ to feel so many things. Grimmjow pulled Ichigo closer. Even if it killed him, he refused to end this feeling. To die while feeling loved and wanted wasn’t a bad way to go.

Their kiss broke with a gasp and Grimmjow whimpered. He didn’t want it to be over. He needed more of his captain. He wanted to stay in his arms for all of eternity. He pushed on the back of Ichigo’s neck in silent encouragement to continue. The blonde laughed softly and pecked his lips lightly before resting their foreheads together.

“You’re amazing, you know that?” Ichigo asked with a wide grin.

“‘M not the one who just screwed the life out of his first officer,” Grimmjow retorted. He loved that laugh. Ichigo kissed his cheek and sat up, pulling his hips back to slowly slide out of the Vulcan. Teeth chewed on a soft inner cheek. Grimmjow found himself clawing at the bed to keep himself from whining and tightening in a vain attempt to keep the man inside him. He didn’t want to be separated.

“Oh fuck. Shit, _damnit_ , Grimmjow I’m sorry,” Ichigo rubbed his thigh in comfort, “The condom broke and I didn’t realize. I’m sorry, man.”

Grimmjow smirked and parted his legs further. “You do not have to be. I knew. I could feel it when you came in me. Please, do not regret it, because I surely will not.”

He rolled his hips softly and pushed, groaning when the cum inside him spilled out and made a mess of his sheets and himself.

“Fuck,” Ichigo croaked. His voice was broken from exhaustion, but his eyes burned with hunger. If he was ready for a second round Grimmjow wasn’t going to refuse. Even if they fucked until he couldn’t cum anymore he still wouldn’t refuse. He always thought he would die in battle, but dying from Ichigo’s cock sounded so much better.

“You’re so damn beautiful, ashayam. I can’t believe you’d let me do this to you,” Ichigo murmured. He was faintly aware of his captain pulling off and discarding the condom recklessly, but he was more focused on the hand brushing up his thigh. The hand didn’t stop. Rough calluses caressed his hip and slipped up his side. Another hand stroked his spent cock as if he had more to give and rubbed his own cum into his skin. Wet fingers poked at his throat, bruises stinging from the touch. He hadn’t realized his captain bit him so hard. A small part of him wished Ichigo had cut deep enough to scar him.

“I wanted you to do this to me,” Grimmjow replied.

Ichigo smiled and Grimmjow smiled back. He can’t believe they did this. Bruised, covered in cum, _stuffed_ with cum in his stretched hole, and his throat raw from screaming so loudly. His captain did this to him. His _t’hy’la_. The man who loved him. It wasn’t in his nature to smile but he couldn’t stop. Not when they kissed. Not when they embraced and purred each other’s names. Not when Ichigo showered him with overwhelming compliments that Grimmjow swore had to be lies. Not when the door peeled open with a hushed hum and a tablet clattered and shattered on the ground, with Uryū gaping at them with wide, horrified eyes.

Grimmjow cringed and dropped his head back onto a pillow. “Fuck.”


End file.
